Dating is another story. An Indian woman who has got a white man must be enlightened, even by Now make her walk next to a white man.
Table of contents
- Bumble heats up India’s dating scene
- Dating in India: The Do’s and Don’ts as a Foreign Woman
- P.S. I Love You
He is African-American. He does not speak a different language. He does not cook exotic dishes or own any non-Western garb. He listens to hip hop music, cracks jokes using racial slurs, and calls me his Punjabi Queen. He pushes me to ask daring questions about race and color. He is secure, unafraid, unapologetic. And he encourages me to be the same. He listens to me patiently. When we argue, he steps back to see my perspective. He brings me flowers to work to brighten my day. He allows himself to be vulnerable and seeks to improve his emotional intelligence on a daily basis.
He awkwardly attempts to say words in my language. He is the first man who encourages me to be unabashedly myself. And he accepts me. So, does it matter that he cannot speak my language? That he is not Sikh, that he does not eat spicy foods, that his skin tone is shades and shades darker than my own? That my parents, who accept and support my relationship with him, cannot connect with him over Punjabi culture? We talk about it. He finds the idea thrilling.
I do, too, once my fear dissipates. What I do know is that I love him. I know he encourages me. And I know that my life and my world is better with him in it. And I think, for now, that is enough.
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Bumble heats up India’s dating scene
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Dating in India: The Do’s and Don’ts as a Foreign Woman
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P.S. I Love You
Loading comments Please try again, the name must be unique. The dark skin and curly hair that I was ridiculed for in Singapore were admired and complimented for the first time in my life. I did wonder if I was being exoticised by some European guys, but the fact that I had to even question why anyone would find me attractive reflected a bruised self-esteem that growing up as an Indian girl in Singapore had dealt me.
Before I say that minority women, especially those with darker skin tones, are generally considered to be less desirable in Singapore, I must admit that I personally know many dark-skinned Indian girls who are dating Chinese, Malay, Eurasian or Caucasian guys here. But the statistics suggest that I may quite possibly know all of them. Another Indian grooms and Chinese brides rounded up the top 5 ethnic group combinations at 5. I have also heard Chinese Singaporeans state unequivocally that they would never date Indians. Furthermore, conventionally Chinese or East Asian features are constantly lauded as the ideal standards of beauty in Singapore.
Numerous advertisements and the recent Cosmopolitan Singapore controversy are testaments to this. Would seeing a Caucasian man and a Chinese woman together elicit the same reaction? Strangely, the most disapproving looks I have received are from fellow Indians. Some of my male Indian friends have remarked to me that my decision to date a Caucasian man, presumably before other Indian men, speaks to a broader pre-occupation with the white male ideal.
These friends have even implied that it is insincere of me to be critical of heterosexual white male privilege and date a white man at the same time. Moreover, why does it appear incongruous when a white man and an ethnic minority woman are seen together?